Who would have ever thought that Santa lived at 1 Santa Claus Lane, Little Rock, Arkansas?

Maybe that's where he hangs out after Christmas? After watching all the Gang Banging in Little Rock documentaries on HBO, I don't see how such a kind and gentle soul such as himself can live in such a rough and tumble town. But then again, a man who keeps child labor (elves, my ass! That's where all the naughty kids go and serve their time, The North Pole SuperMax prison. Making toys for the good boys and girls instead of license plates!)needs to cool out in the 'hood? Hmmmmm....

If he does actually have a US passport, does that deny kids in countries such as Iran, Cuba, Libya, and North Korea, the chance to get some nifty Christmas presents? Doesn't seem fair. What happens if they've been really good? You can't deny some poor child his well deserved goodies even though their government/political system is unfriendly towards the United States. I really would not want to see Santa have to cough up a hefty fine and serve jail time for violating State Department rules and regulations for citizens. Completely unfair.

Speaking of unfair, I think the Boy Scouts need a break from all the Wrath of God shit that's been weighing down on it members. Jeez, accidental electricutions, heat stroke, and lightning bolts are a bit much for this organization to endure. Now, granted, the Boy Scouts have shown resiliency in the face of adversity, but if I'm some kid who's going for some basket weaving badge and have to keep my eye out for electrical lines everytime I have to pitch a tent or look to the horizon for ominous storm clouds, I'd have to say: fuck that!

Cheers